It's more than a year....

Oh my... it's more than a year since my last entry.... What have I been doing??

Moving on with life, sweeping everything that has happened under the carpet?

Kind of!! but not really under the carpet, probably storing inside a box, waiting for it to rotten, till it smells.... ha ha...

Well, I must say, have been busy with my Advance Diploma Course in Kindergarten Education Teaching @ Singapore Polytechnic since last October. It's a appx. 9 months course which NORMAL people take 3 years to get a Diploma. For ABNORMAL people like me who has no patience to study too long. Who is killing herself with tones of assignments. Nevertheless, it's coming to an end soon..... by 16th August.

Yes, in the mist of assignments now!!! I felt a suddenly urge to share my current little missions. Are they still missions when I sake and tired of it?? Definitely. Even i choose not to named it a MISSION, it is STILL the little missions in life that God has sent me forth.

Therefore, I praise and thank God for the little missions.

Catholic Kindergarten

2012
- Form teacher of Daisy A and B
- Pre-Nursery Music and Movement teacher

2013
- No form class - Relieve teaching only
- Administration
- Pre-Nursery Music and Movement teacher
- Moral Education curriculum planner

Advance Diploma in Kindergarten Education Teaching (Singapore Polytechnic)

Oct 2012 - 2013

Stressful but enjoyable.

Thank God for a wonderful
groupmates and classmates.

Very important especially in a course that is 100% assignment.

Church Life

Ha ha.... still free lancing....
I go where I am needed using the talents God has given me. MUSIC lah!!!








At Home

My two darlings (nephews) lor...


Jevin is turning 4 years soon
Jerome is 7 months old

Recharged!!!

I would like to say that…. with God’s grace I have been reCHARGED.

I want to believe that I am and I must sustain it.

Yes, this one week school holiday have been really fruitful. It’s a very HOLISTIC one.

Firstly, to Kare, my dearest sister who have made all the necessary arrangement for our Sun, Sand, Sea trip to Bintan Lagoon Resort. All I had to do it pay $$ and go…  My mind and body have been well ministered to after more then 10 weeks of drowning myself with Work and work  and more work.

Secondly, thanks to Kristyn, my other lovely sister, who encouraged unceasingly and sponsored my holiday with God at ‘Conversation Experience Retreat (CER)’.  All I need to do it say YES, since it’s during my March holidays, pack and GO. My spirit has been lifted up again and feels even more ready to continue my many little missions for Christ again.

The reason why I’m writing this blog is because I want to force myself to share my life these months with all of you and at the same time, more importantly, reflect even deeper of the happening…

I thought I could do it today as 19^th March is a very significant day to remember and also mourn  over it… anyway… it’s the day I entered Pre-novitiate 2 years ago, and it’s also the day I would have officially enter into novitiate (today). However, I am again being distracted by work  and I couldn’t give myself more silence to go into deeper reflection… sigh… will have to try again tomorrow…

Ok.. nights….

Fishing!! Whose fishing whom?

Fishing requires lots of patient.... yeah....

BUT Fishing at Hai Bin Prawning ＠Punggol requires not only patient but also feelings and guts... Feelings to feel the catch... guts to use your hands to catch the struggling fish out of the pond. And I did it this time, all by myself!!!  :) (well... not that big one)

ermm... what mission is this?? what have I learnt? Any message?........... I wonder!!!

Importantly, I know it's a beautiful family activity and a wonderful time spent with my brother at the pond. Well... it too can be boring if we choose to look at it as purely waiting and waiting and no catch.

Therefore Advent as we know is about being patient, waiting and hoping for a catch....

How about turning it over... God is waiting and patiently catching us who are struggling like the fish until we are willing to let go and surrender totally to the catcher.

oh my.. that's too difficult... easier said than done...

Happy New Year!

A new start. a new beginning, a new catch, a new mission and a new liturgical year

It's Over..... for now

Dear friends, just a quck note....... thank you for all your support throughout my journey...

I have completed my mission.... and will be proceeding to next very soon.

I have left with no choice, no options, no hope.... but... definitely God is my only hope... and with the continuous support, I believe I will find my way soon...

Love....

My last chance Lord.... Thy Will be Done.

It’s about 1 year 7 months since my entry to Pre-novitiate.

It’s really Woh… that’s how long I have left home. But thank God for many blessings along the way that I was still able to be with my family. 

2011, hasn’t been a smooth year, many things had happened. Within my family and my formation journey. It’s really overwhelming… well then again… WHO’s journey is smooth right!! 

What’s threatening is that have come to point of the journey that I will be evaluated by the end of the year. My fate whether it’s God’s will for me in Religious Life and to enter into the novitiate or maybe it’s better that I go HOME.

I really don’t know how I should share with you what’s going on in my journey. It’s so mysterious, it’s so complicated. Did I create this? Or it is meant to be like that. Only God knows. All I want is a fair and just judgment at the end of the year. 

Then again.. who is to judge one’s calling? So ultimately is ME right! I hope so. Well, maybe its still religious life, maybe it’s just the wrong congregation… well maybe it’s not for me, maybe it’s the weakness of the institute. Maybe I’m called to elsewhere… ya WHERE!! 

Sometimes I see challenges as growth and blessings.. well maybe challenges experienced now will strengthen me in future… but too many challenges might also be a sign to GO… 

There must be something more…. Only Fools like me and many others will pack and leave the comfort of the world, family and friends for a life so mysterious..

Anyway… is it totally my discernment ERROR, my weakness, my flaws? Can it be the institute ERROR? Can it be the ERROR of another sister? Can it be GOD?

Ya… I guess only God knows… sigh…

But as what I stated above, I'm given the chance and I’m giving myself the last chance to persevere on. God gave a special person, I am sent to a special person who will look at things from external with the interest of me. A third partly who will help me to re-look at my vocation discernment. 

Well, isn’t that strange, I requested for someone to help with my inner-works but end up having to re-discern my vocation… well it’s good to lah… Ultimately, I want to be happy and I want to know what went WRONG!!

Ok… anyway anyway anyway…. Please pray for me and for this SPECIAL person and for FMM…. That whatever happens it’s GOD’S will and not HUMAN will.

House of Stories

18 August 2011, was the day I celebrated all my sweat, tears and joys together with my companions on the journey (a lay Catholic and a Buddhist student).

This 10 weeks journey is the highlight of my Pre-novitiate formation so far. It sums up all that I have been working on towards my growth and put them into practice, and even more. In short, this is an ALL-in-ONE programme.

I never ever thought that I would involve myself in a hospital settings and I really like it very much. The hospital is indeed a ‘House of Stories’, which is the theme of my graduation. In there, there are many lives and each has a unique story. Please allow me to share 3 stories with you.

A diabetic, Buddhist patient who had an infected leg due of a fall. Her treatment was being delayed by another hospital and she decided to ‘run away’ to Assunta Hospital. She was crying in pain and frightened of amputation. She remembered that Mother Mary had help her when she was a poor child and cried to Mother Mary. Thank God, the doctors are able to save her leg. 

A patient, who loves drawing, never tried drawing human portrait because it’s too painful. It will remind him of the death of both his wife and his 15 yr old daughter. He was being challenged to draw. Will this help him to let go of his pain? I don’t know. Nevertheless, he did it, even though he wasn’t satisfied with his drawing.

There’s another sick patient, those life has been transformed & enriched by many in the hospital and her ‘house’ where she lives. She’s a person with very low self-esteem & confidence. Such a person can hardly love herself and others, and carries a lot of baggage. She’s now a freer person and more confident person sim ply because her patient’s stories are hers, their pains are also hers and their search for meaning in life is also hers. When she minister to them, they ministered back to her.

This is a house of transformation. Like it or not, anyone who enters this house, gets their lives transformed. Some found their faith back, many through the expertise of the doctors and nurses found their health back. Many watched their love ones suffer in pain and began to question about life. Some found a new way of living, others departe d. As long as there are some contact with the patients here, life can never be the same.

During my 10 weeks journey here, I have witnessed many lives being transformed. This is a Hospital for the sick and we are all sick people in some ways.